all american family dinner

  • mom: hello son you need to put out the fancy dinner plates. i ordered some Chinese food and we will serve it on the plates so we can pretend i cooked
  • son: of course mom, can u pass me the apple juice
  • mom: of course son. be careful it is very spicy
  • son: *sips juice* OH SUGAR U WERE RIGHT MOM THIS APPLE JUICE IS MUCH TOO SPICY
  • dad: ha ha ha. wash it down with hot dogs, and all american tradition.
  • son: thanks dad. hey, wanna play baseball with me after dinner?
  • dad: we can't tonight, son. tonight is the night we are having our annual family photograph taken
  • mom: i picked out matching sweaters for all of us including the dog.
  • son: we will look great! we should use the photograph as a christmas card! merry christmas from the bakers!
  • dad: great idea, son. don't forget about our fishing trip this weekend
  • son: golly dad, how could i forget that important american family tradition

ness? its your dad. im fucking rich. i deposited $12587 into your bank account. bye.

majorvirgin:

LOOK AT WHAT THEY FUCKING DID TO BOB THE BUILDER

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I AM FUMNG WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS 

SMUG ASS STEPDAD LOOKING ASS LITTLE SHIT 

i literally can not stop eating fritos

thesassylorax:

necromorph-slayinglovemachine:

I’M TWENTY YEARS OLD AND I STILL LOSE MY SHIT AT THIS EVERY GODDAMN TIME

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This episode turns 13 years old this year. That’s horrifying.